As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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