Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
