She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
