Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
