is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
