Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
