I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
