Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize