ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
