Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize