Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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