Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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