You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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