Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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