there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Randomize