And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
i now understand why vodka
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
