so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
