My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
