it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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