I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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