We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
