So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
