There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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