you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize