I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
