I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
