Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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