last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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