Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
