What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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