Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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