i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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