once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I have aggressive nipples.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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