It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
