Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
