i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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