he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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