yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
