last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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