Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I wear drunk well.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
