doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
