I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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