I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
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