ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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