I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
