Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
