I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
