Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
