We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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