well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
When are your genitals available?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize